Motherhood is not about perfection, it is about finding solutions that work. When things get crazy heading out the door in the morning, take a moment to just stop and breathe.
Before I had children I viewed myself as an easy going, calm and centered person. There wasn’t much that ruffled my feathers. I practiced yoga on and off the mat and was very good at not sweating the small stuff. Then my children came along.
My children have taught me about deep love and compassion. They have provided some of the richest moments of my life so far. They have also taught me that I am not the calm and serene person that I thought I was. I have had some very ungraceful moments with my children. I was that women at Target with a two year old on the floor, having a tantrum and the 4 year old tearing off at full speed through the racks, with me yelling “STOP this minute”. Did I mention the sweatpants, undone hair and tears of frustration in my eyes as the women behind me at the till huffed in disapproval of my parenting skills.
Motherhood is humbling but it is also a wonderful opportunity for growth. It is easy to be mindful and calm when all is well in world but a very different challenge when things get stressful. How can mothers cope with the challenges that children present us with? I have relied heavily on my yoga practice. Taking the time to get on my mat every day, even if only for 5-10 minutes, keeps me sane. I also make the time to attend a class at least once a week. A Mom and Baby Yoga class is an excellent opportunity to connect with other moms who are going through the same life changing experiences. The asana, or physical movement, works some of the held tension out of the body and the meditative and breathing practices provides centering and some parenting tools for coping with sticky situations.
The philosophy of yoga provides a wonderful framework on which to build parenting skills:
Be present in the here and now
Take a moment to just breathe. Instead of constantly worrying about how we could do it better or what everyone else thinks about me and my children, I try to accept the truth of how life actually is and let go of what I think it should be. Motherhood is not about perfection, it is about finding solutions that work. When things get crazy heading out the door in the morning, take a moment to just stop and breathe. What does my child need in this moment? What do I need? What next?
Be compassionate to yourself and others
As mothers, we are hardest on ourselves. We need to learn to forgive ourselves for being human and look for alternatives that we can live with. Finding time to nurture ourselves will benefit our whole family in the long run. A happy mother makes for a happy home.
Show your children compassion. Why are they on the floor having a tantrum? Are they hungry or tired? Dealing with a new change in life? Keep that in mind as you deal with the behavior. You can never love a child too much. Hug them as much and often as you can.
Carolyn Gillespie
Isis Fitness Instructor
