New parents know how joyful yet difficult those early months of transition can be as you adjust to your new life with your baby. Here are some practical tips to help reduce any stress you might encounter as you and your partner begin to figure out your new roles as parents.
1. Utilize the relaxation techniques you learned in your childbirth class.
Remember the deep breathing, visualization, massage and light touch you practiced in prenatal classes? These techniques can be even more useful for parenting. Relaxation causes a release of endorphins that will help you let go of all tension in your body. Being mindful and focusing on your breathing can help you redirect your mind away from negative thoughts so you can more calmly respond to stressful situations rather than impulsively react to them. An open and non-judgmental mind can make any tough situation seem easier.
2. Discuss your new roles with your partner and have frequent “check ins”.
Before your new baby became part of the family, you and your partner had your daily responsibilities all worked out. You cooked, vacuumed and sorted the recycling while he or she shopped, dusted and dealt with the trash. Once a baby is in the picture, your roles shift dramatically. Now you may be the main parent caring for the baby, especially if you are breastfeeding, which is an all-consuming job in those first several weeks. This means your partner is doing a lot of the tasks that were your responsibility before the baby arrived. Try to prepare yourself for this shift in roles and check in frequently with each other to keep communication channels open to each other’s needs. Partners can sometimes suffer from postpartum mood changes, too and may need others to help with the day-to-day tasks if they are feeling overwhelmed (see #3). Also, try to be accepting if your partner doesn’t perform your former responsibilities the same way you did. Does it really matter if he puts the Tupperware on the wrong shelf?
3. Delegate to others
After you have your baby, friends and family will start calling to congratulate you and they’ll inevitably ask if you need anything. Take them up on the offer and assign something to them. Make an effort to delegate tasks such as stocking your fridge and freezer with meals, helping with chores around the house or doing the food shopping. Don’t be shy – your friends and family will feel enjoy doing something for you that was truly helpful.
4. Sleep whenever your baby naps
In those first several weeks you will be up with your baby at night for feeding or soothing and will need to catch up on your sleep during the day. It is so tempting to try to get a load of laundry done or empty the dishwasher while the baby naps but do not give in to that urge. After caring for your baby, catching up on your sleep is the next most important thing you need to do. Let others help with the laundry and dishes. Don’t forget to delegate, delegate, delegate!
5. Socialize with other new parents
Before you had your own baby, remember when you couldn’t really relate to your friends once they had kids? Well now your one of them and a whole new world of understanding will begin to open up between you and other parents. Bonding over the common stressors of early parenting helps ease the tension and frustrations of this trying time. Through conversation, humor and, yes, tears, you will help each other find your way. You will know that you are not alone and will benefit from the advice of those who are slightly ahead in the parenting game. Creating a support system and getting out of the house are two of the most important goals for you to accomplish as a new parent.
6. Be aware of your postpartum diet and exercise needs
When you are so completely focused on your baby it can seem almost impossible to put any thought into yourself; however, maintaining a balanced diet and starting a mild to moderate postpartum exercise regimen will give you the stamina you need for parenting a newborn. Just start out slowly by taking walks around the block or joining a mom and baby yoga class. Keep healthy, easily reheated meals at your disposal. You do not need to put together a gourmet spread to be successful. Trader Joe’s frozen meals can be a lifesaver during times like these. Keep it simple.
